Stupidity makes no sense to me

Despite the fact that my computer woes are far from over, I have decided not to go on about them because looking back at some past posts, I realize I sound too much like one of those... well... web-developer geeks. That may have been me once, but no more. Recently I have been entertaining thoughts of how I can get the computer out of my home. Breaking it as I did last week may be one way, but before I do that I should probably find another way to make money that doesn't rely on having it near me.

Although I have yet to begin any serious plan, I get the feeling that it could be at least a two year project for me... (the camera will take longer) then maybe I will be computer free. Part of me wants to do it just for the challenge. Part of me is sick of being dependent on something that cuts me off so completely (partly my own fault) from the real, physical world which we are really dependent on. The fact that computers (at least as they are manufactured and consumed now) are a physical impossibility in a healthy future is a secondary consideration, but it's there. Knowing that the production and disposal of all my gadgets can not be continued, yet continuing it myself just makes me feel stupid, and, as I have said before, one of the major reasons I am here studying sustainability is that once I have learned how stupid our current system of insatiable consumption is, it is impossible to forget it, and unless I forget it or get on the path to quitting, I am just being stupid. I hate being stupid. Stupidity makes no sense to me. Of course, I have no idea what I would do without the camera, and posting the photos to the site. Then again, if I am being smart, I should be able to find something that interest me, and no one ever said that being less-stupid was easy... just less-stupid.

And who knows... maybe someday someone will develop a computer and the associated gadgets that can be produced and distributed around the world to billions of users without destroying our ecosystem. When that happens I will be the first to pick up the camera again (assuming I am ever smart enough to put it down in the first place).