Into the Nagano Sunset

So today I (we) leave for Nagano for the second to last time. While we each only have a backpack full of stuff, and the apartment looks just like it always has for the past year, somehow this feels more final. A delivery man is on his way this very minute to pick up birds cage. They will be riding the bus with us and have been unusually frenzied all morning - as if they somehow know that this is the last time they will see this apartment - flying back and forth to all their favorite hang-outs savoring one last chew on the wallpaper, spending longer than normal sitting on the windowsill and singing goodbye to their bird friends outside.

Tomoe claims to be feeling no apprehension about the move. I, on the other hand, am feeling more anxiety than expected. Mostly because, while everything is going well and opportunities abound, nothing is "certain". Even more-so for her. I already have work up there, and although it does not pay all that much, it's in line with my "life plan" (as if I had such a thing) and I am confident that as long as I am doing something, opportunities will continue to present themselves. For Tomoe though... To make the move from high-paced corporate ladder climbing world where she worked with people as smart as herself, people that her employer payed huge sums of money to recruit and train, to a small town where life is a lot more relaxed and most people are more driven by fresh powder than making vice-president by 35... I am nervous for her, or perhaps more for myself... that I will bear the brunt of her frustrations.

But Tomoe is just as much into this as I am, and wants it just as much. It's not a matter of is the right choice, we already know its the only choice. Here in Tokyo life stopped happening for us a year or so ago when Tomoe gave up the corporate ladder world and I put any new contracts on hold to take the Outward Bound courses. There is really nothing that we are leaving behind that can not be found again where we are going - unless you want to count Starbucks, smog, traffic, and desperate looking men in suits crowding the subway day after day after day after...

We will return one more time for three days later this month. In those three days we will pack, clean, and paint over all the damage the birds did to the woodwork. Once everything is on the truck and the landlord has checked the apartment, Tomoe and I will board a train to Okutama for one last hike. This time, however, instead of making a loop and returning to Tokyo, we will just keep on hiking straight into the Nagano sunset - and our new home.