As I mentioned in my last blog, things have been going pretty well for me lately. I havn't heard any conclusive news from Lund University yet but based on the email I received from the coordinator of the program, I am not worried.

Of course, work never fails to tick me off. Just yesterday my boss took one of my students aside and scolded him for 5 minutes and told him he doesn't need to come back...Why? I don't know. The kid is a real sweety. When I first started teaching him, he had a problem staying awake during class. Then he was teased by some of the other boys in the class so he tried to quit but I convinced him to pick a different class. For the past few months he has been the ideal student. He's enthusiastic about learning, he gets along well with everyone, I really enjoy teaching him. Now I am worried that my boss scared him away because, as my boss said, 'he has a bad attitude.' Funny, I see him for 1 to 2 hours per week and my boss saw him for 2 minutes...I wonder what he saw that I didn't.

Anyways, despite the fact that I said I am tired of living in Japan, I had a good day yesterday. First of all, on my way to pottery class, I found myself riding next to an old woman. We came across a blinking green-turned-red traffic light. As the light turned red, she looked at me and darted out into the intersection. I thought, 'Well, I am certainly not going to let gramma get the better of me!' so I followed suit. On the other side of the road (which, by the way, getting there turned into a bigger ordeal than one would think) she turned to me with a huge triumphant smile and said...something. I had my headphones in so I couldn't really hear her but I nodded enthusiastically. Our 'bond' only lasted a few minutes more but in that short time, I remembered what I liked about Japan in the first place. That feeling stayed with me all day.

I remember when I first came to Japan, I couldn't get over how nice everyone was. EVERYONE! I felt like a celebrity! These days, I'm lucky if someone opens a door for me. Now, I don't want to leave the impression that I'm some kind of 'prima donna'. To be honest, I've often been accused of just the opposite--expecting too little of people. But, after getting used to such 'celebrity' treatment, it is hard to return to normal. I shouldn't even say 'normal'. I can't remember the last time I met someone new in a social situation. That's really sad.

However, I keep telling myself it's by choice. For the last 5 years or so, I have been moving back and forth from Michigan to Japan and have made many friends along the way. For me, saying goodbye is always painful. I don't really know why. I'm not really a sentemental person. (although, lately, I don't know what's going on. These days, I cry at the drop of a hat.) Anyways, I've been telling myself that I don't want to meet and get close to anyone because I will just have to say goodbye in a couple of months. Why bother making new friends if you are just going to turn into 'manditory' email buddies? I've made enough pen pals who never write back in my life that I'm not interested in any more...at least, that's what I keep telling myself.

Anyways, I despite my good fortune lately,I'm still not on top of the world. Tonight I watched Crossroads. I know, a lot of you are judging me for watching a Brittany Spear's movie. I swear, it wasn't my choice. Anyways, as I was watching, I remembered once again, my life's dream...I've always wanted to be musical. I admit, I've been blessed with sufficient brains, atheletic ability, and a good enough personality that I've not suffered any. However, music has always been a dream of mine...Singing, dancing, playing an instrument...anything would do. But, alas, I am not musical. When I was younger, I took piano lessons. That is the extent of my musical training...except 'boner chorus' at Sem. This was the worst of the 3 manditory choirs-- reserved for trouble-making, tone-deaf boys. I had the distinct, historic honor of being one of the first 10 girls assigned to the choir, making it co-ed for the first time since its institution...who knows how many decades before.
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My dreams crushed, now my only hope is that my children will be (somehow) blessed with musical ability despite all hereditary odds. We'll see.