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recent
Today I went for a jog with a few classmates (Kerly, Mandy, and Laura). It was fun, as usual... well, it wasn't really just "a jog", it was a little invention Kerly and I came up with one day called aerunbics, or aerobarun. The point is to spice up a boring jog, while at the same time making it a better work out. The rules are simple, and I highly recommend it.
The two key characteristics of aerunbics is imagination and spontaneity. Aerunbics is based on a training exercise we used to do back in high-school for track and field, whereby we would run through the city, randomly choosing to "sprint to the end of the block", "run at 75% speed to the gas-station", or "walk to the lamp post". That is fun enough, but in aerunbics, we are not restricted to simply varying the speed of our run. Instead, anyone can declare a new style of aerunning at any time, and while the main goal is simply to make it more fun, we have discovered that it often makes for a better workout.
"Skip to the lamp post", "hop on one foot to the corner", "karate-kick to the red car". These are just a few of the examples. (it's amazing how tiring hopping on one foot can be). Other styles may be running backwards, speed-skating (where you run as if you were wearing ice-skates, with a side-to-side motion), ballet twirls, and jump-shop or lay-up (act as though your are making a jump-shot in basket ball... do this for 50 meters and see how you feel).
It's great fun. Give it a try, and pass it on.
But that's not what the topic of this post was supposed to be. Something else happened while we were running. We came to a dock protruding out into the baltic, and I took the initiative to strip down to my swimsuit/running shorts, fully intending to make the plunge into the icy waters. But I couldn't do it. I sat on the edge of the dock staring into the water, wanting to, but unable. Luckily, Laura stepped up and dove in first, paving the way for me. (it was cold, invigorating but cold)
It was just another example of something that I have been thinking a lot about recently regarding myself. I have good ideas, but a real problem with details and execution.
In fact, Laura and I had planned to go downtown this morning to approach the townsfolk at the market about taking some portrait photos of them. I had asked her to come along because it is something I have wanted to do for a long time, but knowing myself, was something I would probably never do on my own. It was a good idea, but I have a real problem with execution, and so I seek out others to help me, to force me to do what I want to do.
My thesis project is another great example. I wonder what would have happened if I did not have two executioners as partners. While I knew for a long time what I wanted to do for the thesis, left alone, I doubt whether I would have even been able to pull it off. It was Roya and Amity who forced me to get out and find people to interview. It was Roya and Amity who forced me to focus on the paper, or the presentation (which by the way we gave Friday and kicked-butt!).
In the same way, I was talking with Tomoe recently about what to do when I get back to Tokyo. I have lots of grand plans. They are good plans as well. Yet, as I was telling her, I fear that I can never really get started unless I find someone who can force me to do what I say I want to do. The single most important task I will face when I get back is to find an executioner who likes my ideas. Without someone to force me to work like that, I fear that I will simply spend my time sitting in front of the computer, or reading books.
I don't want to rely on other people to force me to execute. I want to be able to jump in the Baltic on my own. I want to be able to follow through with my projects and do what I know needs to be done. But how? Is it some missing gene? Is it the way I was raised? Or am I just lazy? How can I make myself do what I say I want to do?
I realize that my best strategy is simply to surround myself with others who are better at details than I am, but at what point does that just become free-loading? At what point do I become worthless? It's not like Roya and Amity didn't have any ideas of their own for the thesis. It makes me wonder if I even played a role in the thesis, or was I simply a tag-along on the adventure I suggested?
In the company I used to work for, they valued my contributions enough that I was not forced to think about he details. I knew what needed to be done, and that was enough... I did the parts I wanted to, and if it was something I was not interested in initiating, someone else was on hand to do it, in fact, the boss would get mad if I even spent time trying to do the detail work... telling me I have to delegate. Yet, I can't get all the way through life like that though can I? At some point I have to start doing the things for myself that I am not naturally inclined to do. Especially when my partners are not my subordinates. Amity and Roya are not my secretaries... they are my equals, so how can I get away with leaving all the boring details to them?
Actually, I'd say you're more of an executioner than you think! The 5 minutes of laughing you started for our AL presentation comes to mind...
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